Awareness by Mark Kane

Mark Kane and I were friends for several years and the characteristics that made him what was unique eventually caused his death.  I was not allowed to go to the funeral because I didn't belong to their sect.  He wrote this and gave me my copy a short while prior to the above events.  Listen!  There is wisdom here for all of us.

"Awareness"  by Mark Kane, 2-7-88

I got rid of some bad stuff this week,
So why do I feel angry, afraid and bare?
It's because the things disposed served as threads,
A security blanket I used to wear.

Wake up, Mark, Wake up!
You've obviously been dreaming.
Those comforting words and games of childhood,
Now reveal their true and sinister meaning.

"You're not a game player any more" my family tells me,
"Must be a phase you're going through".
No, it's just that I am tired of waking in the morning,
Feeling trampled, black and blue.

"But we want the old Mark back;
Indeed, I discovered what they're all about,
If they refuse to change with me,
My only alternative is to say "I want out".

I feel like a river meeting its gorge;
A swift and rough descend.
Yet, there must be a tranquil swimming hole
Awaiting me just around the bend.

                Mark Kane
                2-7-1988 Portland, Oregon

Coach Charles